I get a lot of emails. One reason I don’t mind is that many of these messages can be used as a lesson in copywriting – a “do” or a “don’t.
Here are a couple of examples from a recent day’s mail.
First, from a marketer promoting traffic generation software, these bullets appeared:
• Drive 1000’s of high paying customers to your sites quickly
• Open flood gates to oceans of buy-ready traffic that’s ripe for the taking
• Make bucket loads of money from sites that are overflowing with desired traffic
• Drive tons of targeted traffic on demand to any offer in any niche
• Add new traffic campaigns in no time and see profits growing by leaps and bounds
These bullets might work for a hard-sell item targeting a certain segment of the online marketing world. But for many markets, they’d be a disaster. This copy contains:
… references to extremes (“bucket loads” and “tons”)
… vague promises that hundreds of other marketers might make
… empty cliches like “leaps and bounds” and “to the next level
Of course we’re not seeing these bullets in isolation. The marketers include diagrams, screen shots purporting to be sales reports, and more. But they’re not good models, especially for “conscious” copywriting or fields like coaching, consulting and most professional services.
In contrast, let’s look at some really good copy from Coach Glue. One half of the Coach Glue team used to be a copywriter so we shouldn’t be surprised.
This copy targets many of the same audiences as coaches and other solo-preneurs. Let’s start with some bullets:
Are You Always Worried about Where Your Next Client (and Paycheck) is Going to Come From?
Are You Stuck at the Mercy of Your Clients’ Schedules because You’re Afraid to Say No?
Are You Tired of EVERYTHING in Your Life Taking a Back Seat to Your Business?
They’re still fairly generic, but specific to this market. The language is conversational.
The copy gets even more targeted with these bullets:
Do YOU ever do any of these embarrassing things?
• Skip the shower because you’re too busy working?
• Yell at your loved ones for wanting your attention while you’re in the middle of dealing with a very frustrating technical issue?
• Order take-out or hit the fast food drive-thru a few times a week because you worked straight through all day and didn’t make dinner?
This type of copy is very hard to write because you have to really, really know your audience. It’s good because it resonates deeply with a particular audience and is guaranteed to turn away others.
They also throw in some teaser copy. Personally I’m not crazy about copy that refers to 6 figures but the product clearly offers a how-to program for running a solo business:
• The TOP 3 things you should be doing every day to rapidly grow your business and income.
• EXACTLY what you need to stop doing in your business right now if you want to reach 6-figures or more.
• How answering this ONE simple question will get your dreams off paper and into reality fast.
These bullets make soft promises. Notice the phrases like, “If you want to reach…” “Get your dreams off paper and into reality…”
So hop over and check out the copy. It wouldn’t be the first time someone started studying the copy and ended up buying the product. That’s the ultimate test of good copy, and it’s rational. A company that makes the effort to display good copy probably follows up with a good product.
If you’d like to become a better copywriter, check out this free 21-point guide to writing strong copy, even if you are not a copywriter.
And if you’d like to become a copywriter, I’ve created this one-of-a-kind guide: 3 courses in one. Click here.
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